Communication In Intimate Relationships
What makes relationships successful? What sort of process do we go through to create a romantic relationship? What are a few of the problems we face during them and how should we go about solving those concerns? The queries above are some of the subjects I will deal with in this paper. Relationships can be quite rewarding if the nice outweighs the terrible. The success within an intimate relationship depends remarkably upon effective communication. There is not only one specific way for couples to connect, because each relationship differs. It is important to learn good types of communication to enhance the quality our relationships.
Date night is the movie I chose to compare my subject to a film. In this movie, a couple is having
After getting in a marriage for three years, I feel as though my marriage with my boyfriend is rather successful. Why is a relationship successful? In my opinion, listed below are important qualities of a romantic relationship: Friendship, love, respect, compassion, and passion among others. Friendship is a great basis for any relationship. I don’t consider a couple has to get started on from friendship, but from what I have seen, it is crucial for a friendship to build up. While spending a lot of time together, it is crucial to have similar likes and interests, as good friends do, to keep carefully the fire going. Love is an obvious importance to an intimate relationship, because it is needed to endure the hard times of a relationship, and also the easy times. Compassion is necessary whenever a person in a relationship is having a hard time and needs support; it is vital for a couple to aid each other. Respect is important if you ask me, because I anticipate a mutual respect between my boyfriend and I to hold our boundaries set, and also to keep us both cheerful. Our thoughts and opinions are important to one another. Every relationship has its priorities where different values are even more important, as Anderson clarifies in more complex terms:
“Personal predispositions of one person will connect to the intimacy displays of another to create unique individual valences of the intimacy displays of their partner” (52).
The process to form a strong bond in a romance takes a good amount of time. They differ few to few and take different steps at several speeds. Floyd lists Tag Knapp’s style of relationship development as the following: initializing stage, experimenting stage, intensifying stage, integrating stage, and bonding level. The initializing level is meeting for the first time (342-345). After the initial meeting comes the experimenting level, which is usually where two people get to know each other through conversation (such as for example figuring out what sort of music, movies, and actions someone likes.) Next is the intensifying stage, which is normally when two persons go from just having occasional conversations, to staying nearer friends. The intensifying stage may also include going out in sets of friends or only with one another. The integrating level is when other persons learn to notice your relationship and that commitment has developed. The last level is bondage, which can be when a romantic relationship is announced to everyone, and everyone acknowledges the two as a couple.
My last experience with the model of relationship development was easy. I met my boyfriend and four days later, we started dating. We surely got to know each other quickly, because we spent most of the summer together, directly after meeting, and we had many common interests. The experimenting stage occurred quickly, and we started to be closer friends inside our quickly started marriage. The intensifying and integrating stage came pretty much simultaneously. Everyone knew that people liked one another and were in a romantic relationship almost right away. Bondage for us was very normal and everyone acknowledged us as a few, but still does.
What are some ways to improve our relationships? Analysis says that for a satisfying marriage, there must be five positive behaviors for each and every one negative and that unsatisfying interactions have only one positive behavior for every negative (Floyd.) In my personal relationship, my period as well as my boyfriend is targeted on forming at least five of these positive behaviors. Most days, we have a lot more than five positive behaviors for each and every one negative tendencies, and I assume that does immediately correlate with happiness inside our relationship. Sorgen, on her WebMD feature says “It is the rare couple it doesn’t, sooner or later, run into a few bumps in the road.” According to Sorgen, to boost communication, couples should do the next: make time, set up rules, listen to each other, and make sure to argue in private if you can’t keep your voice down. Personally i think like my relationship follows these suggestions. We make sure no matter how active we are, we find time to invest together, and talk topics out, if we need to. If we do enter arguments, we have guidelines, so we don’t become too mean. We as well try our best to listen to one another whether we disagree or not, and we do not make a scene in public. Personally, being delicate to another’s thoughts and feelings is vital that you do; that is clearly a problem I have in my own romance. When he doesn’t trust what I am declaring, he becomes rude. I am an emotional gal, and my feelings are hurt easily and he knows what to tell get me to stop talking. It could help us a whole lot if he would relax when I get mental, and talk calmly rather than getting angry. This would prevent us from saying phrases we don’t mean. Oftentimes, when I am emotional for a serious reason, he does not take my emotions significantly, and says something to upset me extra. “Why do we turn into emotional whenever we do? The most frequent essay example way in which emotions occur is when we impression, rightly or wrongly, that a thing that seriously affects our welfare, for better or worse, is happening or about to occur..” (Ekman 19.) Although my boyfriend could be relatively emotionally insensitive, he does apologize afterwards if he hurts my thoughts, which means too much to me.
Compromise is essential in relationships also. It can never just be about one person, or it is a one-road relationship that’s bound to fail. According to Floyd, it is important to emphasize pleasure and positivity, cope with conflict constructively, have practical anticipations, and manage dialectical tensions (362-367.) For my boyfriend and I, we try to be spontaneous and carry out things out of the ordinary on a regular basis; that emphasizes excitement. Exactly like in Date Night, when Phil and Claire Foster have problems due to having the same each day routine, romantic interactions may have challenges when things will be the same every single day. When they are chased and nearly killed after getting mistaked for thieves when they took another lovers reservations at a cafe. After all of the excitement to be chased and nearly killed, their relationship was far better because they appreciated the other person much more after all of the excitement. A transformation in a mundane program sometimes can help move away from relationship problems. We likewise try to thank the other person for things that people do just to make one another happy, to ensure that both of us know we take pleasure in what we do for just one another panethnicity; that emphasizes positivity. Handling conflict constructively is the most important, because there is conflict in every relationship that I’ve experienced and if conflict isn’t handled constructively, it could obviously cause an unhealthy relationship. Sensible expectations help with keeping order in a relationship. You can’t expect a person to completely drop his/her life to be with someone else. There should be balance in the partnership for it to be reasonable. Managing dialectical pressure is working with two opposite requirements (Floyd 366). Another way to help a relationship is to simply accept the person for who they happen to be and not to attempt to change who they are. You should like a person for who he/she is definitely, and if you cannot accept see your face for who he/she is definitely, you shouldn’t be in a marriage with him/her (Sorgen).
In this paper, I explained why is a relationship powerful, and what you can do to make a relationship better. Every couple’s romantic relationship is different and there is not one way to go about handling a romantic relationship, or its problems. Make sure you love, respect, and demonstrate look after the person you like, and try to understand each other’s opinions and beliefs, regardless if you don’t exactly trust your spouse. Work Cited
Anderson, Peter A good., et al. Improvement In Communication Sciences Quantity XIV.
Stamford: Ablex, 1998. Printing.
Elkman, Paul. Emotions Unveiled: Recognizing Faces and Feelings to Improve
Communication. New York: Henry Holt, 2003. Print
Floyd, Kory . Interpersonal Communication: THE COMPLETE Story. NY, McGraw
Hill, 2009. Print.
Levy, Shawn. Date Evening. 20th Cetnury Fox, 2010.
Sorgen, Carol. “7 Relationship Problems and How to Solve Them.” WebMD. N.d. Web. 15,